SEASON 20: THE FINISH LINE

The Amazing Race, Episode 11/12, Season 20, Japan and Hawaii:

Not that we necessarily wanted it to happen, but we knew it would.

Rachel and Dave 

Egocentric combat helicopter pilot Dave Brown and his wife Rachel, a project manager, continued their dominance of this season’s race, winning both the penultimate leg in Japan and the final leg in Hawaii, thus taking home $1 million.

In Dave’s words, they “successfully completed Operation Amazing Race.” 

So they did. On the season, the couple won eight of the 12 episodes, an Amazing Race record, despite what seemed to be persistent tension in their relationship. (Or maybe because. Who knows?)

In the two-hour finale, Rachel, generally a cheerful sort, seemed to have had enough, dropping at least two “F” bombs in his direction.

As always, though, amnesia set in at the finish line.

“I feel this race has really brought us together,” Rachel declared.

While their win was predictable, it wasn’t easy.

Supplying producers with the cliffhanger they needed, Dave and Rachel were the first to arrive at the finish line of the last leg.  

Art and J.J.

However, Phil sent them back to complete a roadblock they missed. Suddenly, Art and J.J., those wiseguy border patrol agents, seemed to have a chance.

Wasn’t to be, as Art proved dreadful at a challenge that required him to slide downhill on an anorexic toboggan. Rachel, fit and athletic, had no problem with that test and regained the lead.

The first hour of the two-hour finale was mainly spent in Japan, where all our stereotypes of the Japanese were confirmed.

Turns out they’re crazy about game shows, maybe even one called Bring That Chicken Home, which features the Japanese version of Jerry Lewis as the announcer and a crowd that’s endlessly amused by people falling down.

And the Japanese really like their sushi. Check. And they love to take photographs. Check.

Rubber chickens

The purpose of the time in Japan was to send one of the four remaining couples packing. That worked out to be the dating divorcees, Ralph and Vanessa.

They started with a disadvantage, as Vanessa was nursing a sprained ankle. That proved to be her downfall, literally, as she had to do the Bring That Chicken Home roadblock. The challenge involved running on a moving walkway and jumping up at suspended rubber chickens. It was painful; it was hard; and it took too long.

Dave and Rachel won the leg in Japan, their seventh victory on the season, tying the Race record. Art and J.J., the border patrol agents were second, Brendon and Rachel, she of Big Brother fame, were third.

Obama birth certificate

The three teams flew to Hawaii from Japan for the final leg. Now it would have been fun if the first Road Block involved joining Donald Trump in the search for Barack Obama's birth certificate, but instead of that the racers had to hoist themselves up a 44-story building and then rappel down, headfirst. I couldn’t watch.

Then one member of each team had to shave a large block of ice. I guess that’s a Hawaiian custom. After that, each couple hopped in a helicopter – “I’m an aviator myself,” Dave told the pilot – on their way to a challenge that involved rescuing a swimmer who was lost at sea.

It was after that that things got a little dicey for Dave and Rachel, as they missed a sign and thus skipped a challenge. Not to worry. They doubled back, caught up with Art and J.J., regained their lead and went on to win for the record-breaking eighth time.

The border guys took second again.

Brendon and Rachel

Brendon Villegas and Rachel Reilly finished third and last on the leg. They were undone because they took a cab when they were supposed to walk, a surprisingly common race mistake. “I hate you right now, you’re blaming it all on me,” the ever-whiney Rachel told Brendon, who actually hadn’t been blaming her.

So what kind of a season was it? 

Good but not great.

Given his arrogance, Dave was easy to dislike, though he didn't rise to the loathsome stature of some previous Race jerks. And while he thought he and Rachel were better at the game than the others, alas, they were. Again, and again, and again. Goodbye suspense.

Art and J.J., who won three episodes, were fun, always taking time out to trash talk the other competitors and each other. That was entertaining, but I don’t think they had a back story of any sorts. Would a win by them have meant anything at all?

Speaking of favorites, the Kentucky boys, Mark and Bopper, fifth-place finishers on the season and the only other duo to win an episode, were the most likeable of the teams, and if there were justice in the world, they would have won.

Here’s hoping that they get to come back, barf bag and all, in some sort of unfinished-business season.

Overheard:

J.J.: When he (Art) looks ridiculous, it makes me kind of warm and fuzzy inside.

Dave (to Rachel): Just stop, silence is golden.

Rachel:  Then why don’t you shut the (bleep) up.

Art: I can’t get to the bottom of the stinking hill.

Phil: Five continents, nine countries, 22 cities and more than 36,000 miles.

Brendon: The Amazing Race has tested our relationship,

Order of finish last leg:

1) Dave and Rachel

2) Art and J.J.

3) Brendon and Rachel

Pool Winners:

Team Showers:      $50

Drew and Emily     $30

Team Bushnell:      $20

Thanks to everyone. Have a good summer. 

Jim