Amazing Race, 31, Episodes 11 and 12
Netherlands/London/Detroit – I’m watching the start of an amazing race on NBC. Ten Democrat candidates for president all prepped and ready to go.
Pretty soon, I know Phil Keoghan will come out and send the hopefuls to Dubai where they’ll shimmy down the tallest building in the world.
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| At the start of the race |
The guy who looks like Tim Conway will lean upon his small business savvy. Some of the others will speak Spanish as they float to the ground. And in the end, one person will be eliminated, maybe that tall white-haired fellow from somewhere in the northwest.
But, wait a minute, Phil is over on CBS, ring-mastering the two-hour finale of the real Amazing Race, the marathon that started two months ago with 11 duos, all graduates of one reality show or another. I watch.
As always, only one team survived, only one team pocketed the $1 million. "And what team was that?" those of you who weren’t watching ask?
OK, spoiler alert. Here’s what happened.
Four teams – Korey/Tyler, Christie/Colin, Jamal/Leo, Nicole/Victor – took off for London in Episode 11, the first hour of the show and the penultimate leg of the race. (Golly, isn’t “penultimate” a great word.)
Nicole Franzel and Victor Arroyo were the odd team out, as they came from Big Brother and the other three duos were veterans of the Amazing Race.
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| Victor rows |
Because of this, the other kids were a little mean to them, not sharing info, that sort of thing. Maybe that was why Nic and Vic were eliminated. Or maybe it was that they lost too much time trying to row a two-person scull. Those boats are flimsy. Who knew?
Three teams remained, flying to Detroit for Episode 12, the finale, closure at last.
Minor complaint: At no time did they face one of those season-ending memory challenges, the ones in which they have to arrange the flags of the countries they visited, or
remember all the goofy or gorgeous costumed locals who stood on the finish-line mats with Phil. I live for those challenges.
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| Finish line hats |
Still, the tests in Detroit were demanding, interesting, worthy of a finale.
Right off the bat, Leo, Tyler and Colin found themselves being lowered head first from the top of very tall building. I couldn’t really watch, though the guys didn’t even seem all that scared.
On the way down, there were numbers to be spotted, taken tougher the combination of some monstrous bank vaults.
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| Jamal and Leo earlier in London |
Leo Temory of the Afganimals, first to arrive at the vaults, was the last to leave, cracked by the safe cracking. It was as if he were back in junior high trying to open his locker for the first time. Make a mistake. Repeat the mistake. Again and
His cousin, Jamal Zadran, waited and waited, the game over for them and their pool backer Dennis Doell, who, nonetheless receives a consolation prize of $30.
Unlike Leo, the cool kids, Tyler and Colin, spun their dials, swung open the doors, left Leo back in the hall, on the floor bemoaning his fate, as they went on to fowling, a Detroit game I didn’t know existed in which you throw a football at some bowling pins.
After that, there was vinyl record pressing and drum kit assembling. Then, whamo, the race was over.
So, who won and why?
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| Colin explains things to Phil |
Life partners Christie Woods and Colin Guinn, finished first on the season, their victory sending $100 to their pool-backers, Emily Morgan and Drew Mokris.
Colin saw the win as affirmation of a transformation that saw him go from angry man (Season 5) to Zen man in Season 31. He had a point. Rather than turn on Christie for her problems in Episode 11 (they almost lost because she couldn’t crack the Enigma code) he was supportive, encouraging.
But, Christie deserved lots of credit for life-coaching him down from the ledge when he was getting beaten by the drums. “Take a breath. Take a breath,” she whispered, and so he did.
It was -- I'm sure most of you
made this connection -- akin to the inspirational moment in Best in Show when Cookie Fleck (Catherine O’Hara) tells her husband Gerry (Eugene Levy) that he’s going to show Winky. Here’s the clip.
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| You're going to show Winky |
I’m happy for C and C, but I'm sad for runners-up Korey Kuhl and Tyler Oakley. Boy, were they good, finishing first or second in seven of the 12 episodes. And they seemed like terrific guys, quick to laugh at themselves, never mean to the other contestants. (And they won $50 for poolsters Louise and Will Wadsworth of Team Walkworth.)
So was it a good season?
I thought it was. Good contestants, good challenges, terrific scenery. Though, I never found the guiding gimmick – a reality show faceoff – all that compelling.
Who really cares if someone was on Big Brother or the Amazing Race? But it did mean that the contestants were used to television’s demands, quick with the quips, ready to play to the camera.
Awards:
Least likeable: Hands down, Rachel Reilly, who partnered with her sister Elissa Slater and lasted for eight episodes. In real life, Rachel may be a sweetheart, but on the Race she was wonderfully scheming and snarky, a train wreck you had to watch.
Most likeable: Chris Hammonds and Brett LaBelle. A lawyer and a cop, they seemed challenged by many of the challenges, but they were funny and flippant, over-achievers with big hearts.
Best athlete: Becca Droz of Team Fun. Was there anything she couldn’t do?
Most valuable player: Korey Kuhl. He was a quick study, and a calm presence. And his tears at surviving to the finale seemed genuine and certainly well-earned.
Most missed: I certainly wish that Rupert Boneham, the bearded guy who went out early had lasted longer. He had a presence. He was fun.
Best decision: CBS has announced that The Amazing Race has been renewed, though the date for its airing during the 2019-20 season hasn’t been set. As seems to be the norm, the show is essentially a substitute, off the bench when some other show stumbles.
Maybe Season 32 could feature castoffs from the Democratic primaries. You miss out on visiting every county in Iowa, but you do get to travel around the world and maybe win $1 million. All in all, not a bad deal.
Overheard, Episodes 11 and 12:
Victor: I don’t want to look in the Afghanimals’ direction.
Jamal: I want to buy a helicopter.
Leo: It sounds a little confusing because it was a little confusing.
Victor: (On the cab driver) We’re like, "What the heck is he talking about?"
Colin: I had to like stay in the flow and let our subconscious minds take over.
Leo: We went from being lion to little mice looking for cheese.
Tyler: We love shopping.
Korey: I’m just proud of us.
Victor: We did way better than we expected.
Nicole: I cried more on this show than I did on two seasons of Big Brother.
Colin: Last time we had youth on our side, this time we have wisdom.
Leo: We raced. We went on trains. We flew. We yelled, and now we’re coming back to you, America.
Jamal: This is the Super Bowl. This is game seven of the World Series.
Leo: I’m about to walk off a building for a million bucks.
Colin: We have eggs; we don’t have chickens. So, we’re not going to count them yet.
Order of finish Episode 11:
1) Jamal and Leo
2) Korey and Tyler
3) Christie and Colin
Order of finish Episode 12
1) Christie and Colin
