By Jim Memmott
Amazing Race, Season 22, Episode 1
Los Angeles/Bora Bora -- Here we go again.
Some dating surfers came in first; some country firefighters
came in last; there was a terrifying sky dive (all went well) and there was life, and frustration, at the beach.
None of that, of course, could match the trauma of the
Downton Abbey finale (fight fair, PBS), but the first episode of Season 22 of
The Amazing Race wasn't meant to be a shocker. Rather, it was a
getting-to-know-you shakedown cruise.
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| Max and Katie |
And even that's not to be confused with a real-life high-seas cruise, where retirees munch ketchup sandwiches, swig bourbon and spend endless days playing Monopoly with strangers.
That scenario would have been especially hard for two of this
season’s contestants, Max and Katie, newlyweds from Buffalo.
“In our everyday life we don’t have any friends,” Katie
announced.
“Her likeability is low when it comes to strangers,” Max
explained.
Whew. Don’t sound like real Buffalonians to me, not the sort
of people who would give you the Ryan Fitzpatrick jerseys off their backs. (OK, that may not be a big sacrifice, but you get my
point.)
Max and Katie did survive, however, by playing nice on the
beach at Bora Bora.
 |
| Sand castle |
All the other teams were at or on their way to the pit stop,
but M and K along with Caroline and Jen (country singers) and Matthew and
Daniel (firefighters from South Carolina) were getting nowhere looking for a
clue in a sand castle.
So they decided to
abandon that challenge (never ever have three teams done that in the history of
the Amazing Race) and race canoes to the
finish. The first two teams at the pit stop would survive despite a four-hour
penalty. Last team in would be eliminated.
The firefighters, who thought they could win because they're guys, capsized twice
and came in last. Thus they were gone before we really got to know them,
heading home to a lot of teasing from their mates in the fire hall about being
beaten by “two blonde girls.”
The episode began
with Phil Keoghan declaring – drum roll, please – that the team that
finished first on the day would receive two express passes, those coveted
tickets that allow a pair to skip a challenge when they're in trouble.
But, and here's the catch, the winning team could only keep one of the passes.
The second had to be given to another team during one of the next three episodes.
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| Jessica and John |
Five duos made a pact early on that, should one of their
teams finish first, it would give the second express pass to the second
alliance team to arrive.
Thus, the winning team, surfers Jessica and John, would seem
to be obligated to give that second pass to the second alliance team to finish, David
and Connor, a father and son duo with a compelling back story (they are both
cancer survivors).
But, holy cliffhanger, the winners implied that they
might not make good on their promise. Stay tuned on that one. (And stay tuned
on a possible marriage proposal. Jessica says she’s looking forward to “wearing
the white dress.”)
It’s early days, so
it’s hard to know which teams to like, which teams to despise.
 |
| Hockey mullet |
You had to admire Chuck, Wynona’s husband, if only for his
brave mullet, the first ever hairdo of that sort on
Amazing Race, though I suspect that it’s
fairly common on
Amazing Race Canada.
(OK, I made that up.)
Joey and Meghan, each a YouTube sensation, seemed less than
admirable at first glance, if only for his excessive enthusiasm.
Idries and Jamil, twin OB/GYNs (another Amazing Race first, I bet) may be one of those teams with strong
resumes and weak skills (they can’t swim, for one thing).
Winnie and Pamela, best friends from Los Angeles, came
across as cheerful schemers, which usually helps on the Race.
Mona and Beth, roller-derby soccer-moms, have something to prove to
their kids, which usually dooms a team in the long run.
Caroline and Jennifer, country singers, have good genes: Caroline
is a descendant of Daniel Boone. Jennifer is the granddaughter of John Wayne.
Brothers Anthony and Bates are professional hockey players; though, surprisingly, they don’t have mullets.
Overheard
Chuck: I very
much love doing taxidermy.
Joey: Yeah we are
cute; we know.
Phil: All right,
let’s get this race started. The world is waiting for you.
Idries: Shut up.
Jamil: That’s our code word for 'I love you.'
Beth: In roller
derby we learn from our mistakes
Max: In our
diabolical minds, we had to do what we had to do to survive.
Order of finish:
1) Jessica and John
2) Anthony and Bates
3) David and Connor
4) Pamela and Winnie
5) Mona and Beth
6) Joey and Meghan
7) Chuck and Wynona
8) Idries and Jamil
9) Max and Katie
10) Caroline and Jen
Matthew and Daniel
Order of selection:
Here’s the order in which we pick for our pool:
Allison,
Emily and Drew,
Team Bushnell,
Team Showers,
Team Beltway
Dennis Doell
Team Boston
Bob and Sandy
Cindy and Jim
Team WalkWorth
That's it,
Jim
