Zen and the Art of a Megaleg Amazing Race

The Amazing Race

 

Season 34, Episode 3 (first half)

 

By Jim Memmott

 

Bologna, Italy – Hold your horses.

 

No one won; no one lost. To the disappointment of those who love closure, Episode 3 was the first hour of a two-hour Megaleg.

 

Two detours, two roadblocks, two cities, the first hour in Bologna (this week), the second in Florence (next week.)

 

Not that nothing was learned.

As always, the Race drove home this point: Manual transmissions aren't for the faint of heart.

 

This week, Luis Colon couldn’t find reverse. His wife, Michelle Burgos, (both right) had to push the car backwards to get out of a jam.

 

Once again, we also learned that reading the clue is important. Newlyweds Glenda and Lumumba Roberts speed-read a clue, missing the instruction to drive to the next spot. They set out on foot; valuable time was lost

 

Bad performances do made for good theater.

 

For the second week in a row, Claire Rehfuss (left with Derek Xiao) stole the show by screwing up. Last week, she couldn’t yodel. This week, she couldn’t put together a motorcycle, in part because she didn’t understand how to work a ratchet wrench.

 

And though they had a rough outing, Glenda and Lumumba got lots of screen time. To their credit, they seem genuinely upbeat, at times even amused by the troubles they cause themselves.

 

Motivational speakers Dom Jones and Rich Kuo had a bumpy ride.

 

He couldn’t handle the stick shift; and I don't think he's read "Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance." As he struggled, Dom soothed him with kind words: "It's just an object," she said of the car. "Objects can be manipulated."

And Sharik Atkinson's performance sufferered because she got sleepy during the anatomy lecture. So did I;

There were good performances, as well.

 

The military brothers, Marcus and Michael Craig had a strong outing, as did sisters Emily Bushnell and Molly Sinert, with Emily

doing a whizbang job of Ducati assembly. A single mom, she’s put together furniture from Ikea. The bike was a breeze.

 

The bike was easy for David Hernandez, as well. Why not? He’s a helicopter mechanic who’s building a car in his spare time.

 

A minor quibble: Shouldn’t the racers have ridden the bikes they got up to speed? Just saying.

 

Overheard

 

Glenda Roberts: I’m feeling great about my stick shift driving skills...As soon as I say that, I stall.

 

Luis Colon: I have no idea how to reverse this.

 

Molly Sinert:  We are getting along like we have been sisters our entire life.

 

Glenda: Why are you (Lumumba) stopping to ask someone directions if you know where you’re going?

 

Quinton Peron: I don’t know what the hell I’m doing.

 

Luis: Righty tighty; lefty loosey.

 

Emily Bushnell: It (assembling the bike) was kind of easy, so I felt I was doing something wrong.

 

Derek Xiao: Claire has a couple screws loose.

 

Claire Ruhfuss: I definitely had screws loose today.

 

Dom Jones: I’m sending to you energy, honey, strength, balance and focus.